Mental Health Tips Your Horse* Wants You To Know
Mental Health Tips Your Horse* Wants You To Know
*these tips will be helpful, even if you aren’t in the horse world
A quick intro and what to expect from this blog… I’m Beth Lauren Parrish, a horse riding instructor since the year 2000, certified since 2005, and then added certified hypnotherapist in 2022, to help those with or without horses to feel their best.
I mention these dates to offer you a clear understanding that I felt stuck in one profession (twenty two years to be exact) and then took a big leap of faith to jump into the unknown.
The social pictures show how I’ve been incredibly successful. I also wanted to share the behind the curtain perspective with you today, on World Mental Health Day, so you understand that everyone has their own obstacles in their minds that they often battle with quietly.
In case you’re more into scanning quickly and only reading what makes sense in your life, I created a list of five main ideas to help with your mental health, along with some explanations of how they helped me. Then I’ve added what your horses think of these ideas… (non-horse friends, I’m sure you’ll still like their thoughts too).
Number ONE: When in doubt: self-doubt, doubt of how to move forward, or doubt if you can let go of past experiences, take a few moments to breathe. Seriously. Pause and breathe. You can place a hand on your heart, your lower belly, or on something tangible near you (or perhaps a sweet dog or cat?).
As you breathe, say to yourself: “I’m here to experience all of life. I accept how I feel right now. I am allowing myself to feel what I need to feel. I know that I can begin to make small changes when I’m ready, one stride at a time.”
I’ve had so many moments when I would feel like I was in over my head with life. I’m a big dreamer and often bite off WAY more than I can chew. But once I get still, breathe, and soften into the moment, I remind myself that there is NO rush. I can go as slow as I need to. (And this was clearly the only thing I could do when I was recovering from my surgeries. Click here to see the full list of mishaps, if you don’t know my story).
So please, give yourself grace when you’re working through something (or multiple things).
And your horses will be so grateful that you are taking these moments to be true to how you’re feeling. They like when you tell them how you’re feeling, even if it isn’t pleasant. They feel relief when you are being congruent. (Your inside feelings match the outward energy you’re presenting). Be sure to tell them out loud how you’re feeling and let them know that you’re doing the best you can with how you’ve shown up today. You might be surprised by how they respond in beautifully supportive and kind ways.
Number TWO: Naps are essential: If you are an overachiever, it can be so tempting to grab another coffee and push on through. But that can quickly lead to burnout in so many ways. If you allow yourself to take a twenty minute power nap, you can imagine like you’ve split your day into two, so you can have a whole new perspective for the second half.
I’ve been known to get a feeling like I’m getting completely ‘unplugged’ when it’s time to take a power nap. I literally can’t fight it anymore. It’s my mind, body, and spirit saying very clearly, “lady, you NEED to hit the reset button”... And when I wake up, everything feels so much easier than the hour before I was resisting that nap.
So… if you’re able to allow yourself this time to nap, don’t feel guilty about it. Think of naps as a superpower. You’re recharging your battery to take on the rest of the day with gusto!
And your horses understand the power of those little siestas. They take them any chance they can when they feel safe. When you allow yourself to take these naps, you’re telling yourself that you are safe and that does wonders for your nervous system.
Number THREE: Allow showers to cleanse your mind, as well as your body. If you have a lot of unwanted thoughts that like to creep into your mind throughout the day, showers (water in general) help you clear these out faster than anything I’ve experienced. Make it a ritual to shower more often and do the following exercise:
As I let the water wash over me, I allow the unwanted, negative, ridiculous thoughts to show up and I tell them to go down the drain. This has helped me so many times, especially when I would get fixated on an issue when I didn’t feel like I could help someone completely. That people-pleasing tendency will often rear its ugly head when I’m tired (hence the naps as #2) or when I’m overwhelmed (see #1 again).
As I allow the negative thoughts to wash away down the drain, I ask myself, what thoughts would serve me the most? I often get insights towards a new creative project or a quiet whisper saying: “I am enough. I am capable of amazing things.”
And most importantly, I remind myself that I am not here to save anyone. I’m here to guide and offer new perspectives, but I can’t take the reins for anyone. They need to grab life by the unicorn horn all by themselves to feel their power from within.
And the horses would encourage you to also do this ritual when cleaning up their manure. You can imagine every pile of manure is like a negative thought that you get to fling away and create a much tidier and happier place for them to live, as well as the same for in your mind!
Number FOUR: Turn off your phone completely. GASP. I said it. Guess what? Everything will be okay, I promise. Unless you’re on call as a first responder or have someone that would really need you for an emergency… in that case, turn your phone to ‘do not disturb’ except for those numbers.
But if you have the ability to schedule time to turn off your phone for extended periods of time, I highly recommend this liberating feeling.
Grab one of the books that have been quietly waiting on your shelf for you to dive into. Go spend more time with your loved ones, your animals, or in nature (or all of these together). The feeling of turning off the phone can feel daunting, as we are so trained to continue checking it, but that’s why it’s even more important to shake free from it as often as possible.
When I do my hypnotherapy sessions, they are all through my computer, so I get this jump in my heart with excitement that I get to turn off my phone completely. When complete, I’ve been experimenting with waiting longer and longer to turn it back on. It allows me to focus on more of what truly matters in my life: being able to be fully present to whatever my heart is guiding me towards. It could be having long and interesting conversations and walks with my husband and two cute dogs (well, my husband is quite cute too, but let’s get back to the subject at hand…). It could be spending time with my horses without the need to do selfies with them (although they have reached expert level at this point, as Pepper Pony looks at himself as he nibbles my back to show off his teeth and Indy does his funny face as soon as he sees the phone)...
Can you see how my focus shifts so easily? That’s why turning the phone off is imperative.
I hope you will be inspired to be brave and shut off the loud parties happening on those small Jetson-dreamed-up screens. You will finally notice how you feel about things, as turning off your phone will encourage you to think for yourself again. Yes. I said that.
And… Remind yourself that you are POWERFUL. Those little screens don’t usually want you to remember that.
And our horses don’t really understand this weird fascination we have with those little screens. All they notice is our attention is completely split. Their human isn’t truly with them. And that can cause resentment at the very least, all the way up to dangerous situations at the worst. Be with your horse in all ways, as much as possible. Your clear and focused mind, body, and spirit are what they crave to be around. As I like to say, do this to “become the rider your horse can trust.”
Number FIVE: Engage in JOY in any form! When was that last time you laughed so hard you had to run to the bathroom to pee? Or is that just me?
Anyhow, I want you to create a game to see if you can find things that make you laugh and then share them with others. Because laughing and smiling is contagious and so incredibly good for your mental state.
My husband and I often play little games of making up lyrics about our animals to make each other laugh. When our Bearded Collie, “Obi-One” was so excited about his car rides, he would poke his nose out of the window, and then look back at our Border Collie, Bridget with such satisfaction and his face hair pushed back wildly. And every time, I would hear my husband begin the ‘updated’ version of “A Whole New World” from Aladdin, just for our dogs.
Here are the lyrics. You’re welcome:
I can smell you the world...Stinky, odoriferous, and splendid, tell me, Bridget, now when did you last let your nose decide? A whole new world....
I can open your nose, take you odor by odor...when they start that big motor, we can take the magic ride. A whole new world...
With new aromas to pursue, we can go everywhere and smell what's there. Let me share this smelly world with you...
I’ve recently started watching golf on television again, as it used to make me a little sad that I wasn’t playing consistently. (That was my other main passion, along with riding). Now I have shifted my thoughts about it and can truly cheer on every player and even imagine I’m playing the course with them. I do have plans to start playing again, now that the weather has finally cooled down here (we are south of Hot-lanta, Georgia). It now brings me so much joy to see the players get in their groove and also how they come back after setbacks.
That’s what life is all about. Your comebacks need to be stronger than your setbacks. And finding all the tiny ways to be grateful and joyful are key, when it comes to being kinder to your mind.
Your mind is always listening, so you might as well give it information that will excite your imagination.
What will you dream up next, so you can engage in more joy?
And your horses absolutely adore when humans tap into that inner joyful feeling, much like when they were children. I let my inner-eleven-year-old self out to play nearly all the time when I’m with my pony. He really loves when we run together in the arena and tosses his mane with glee, as he does his best ‘Tigger from Winnie the Pooh’ impressions when I quickly change direction. It’s an incredible feeling to allow ourselves to simply enjoy the moment.
Remember: You have the ability to shift your thoughts… and when you choose better feeling thoughts, your whole world can change.
You’ve got this.
And so do I.
𝙈𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙨𝙚 𝙗𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪. 𝘼𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨. 💕🐎
-Beth Lauren Parrish
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Resources for you:
Self-Hypnosis Audio Subscription (this page will also offer a complimentary audio: Come Back to Your Calm State)
For those who ride: Beach Ride Meditation (Free YouTube audio to feel safe, supported, and loved while imagining you’re on a beach with your horse)
If you feel like things are weighing you down, you can listen to this 8 minute audio while standing still, to clean up your energy field: Energetic House Keeper (Free on YouTube)
Interested in the powerful hypnotherapy sessions that I offer online?
Check out this page and schedule a free strategy session with me.
