What I gave up...
Dec 11, 2021
What I gave up…
As I stood in front of my pony, after feeding him his breakfast, he inched closer to my insulated glove to begin licking it.
I quickly took off my glove to feel his warm tongue on my palm.
A wave of gratitude came over me.
I could feel him thanking me for the life I offer him.
At the same time, I was sending him appreciation for being such a steady friend in my life.
As he continued licking my hand, I felt my heart open and I telepathically thanked him for being such a wonderful pony.
I love how he never falters to tell me how he feels about what he wants.
I love his kindness and his clarity.
I felt him thank me for always being consistent with his care, with my invitations to play, and also, for how I don’t push him into doing things he’s not interested in.
I was getting teary-eyed at this point. He felt that and decided to stomp on his rubber feed dish.
This made me giggle, as it’s his sign to me that he expects me to fill it again.
He knows how to shift my emotions quickly.
This kind of relationship happened gradually.
It can be created by anyone willing to truly listen to their horse, be willing to ask what they want, and go with the flow when they might have a difference of opinions.
I had to give up a few things to get here.
I had to give up the old saying that I had on repeat for many years: “He gets to do whatever he wants for 23 hours of the day, so he should be willing to give me one hour and do what I want.”
Have you heard that before?
Yes, I gave that up.
That’s what a truly kind relationship is all about.
Now I wait for him to come to me, while I’m setting up the tripod to film our interactions.
He’s told me several times now, that if he doesn’t come to me and I have to go find him in the woods, it means he’s just not that interested in doing human-related things.
For someone who was told as a child that you have to ‘make your pony go over the jump’ and ‘smack him if he refuses’.... This new way of waiting for him to decide if he wants to do things is strange, and yet, an incredible relief.
Now I know, when he comes over to me as I’m holding his halter and wearing my helmet, he’s ready for a session.
And just to be sure, I’ve also given up keeping his halter on while I place the saddle on him.
This gives him one last chance to change his mind, in case he doesn’t want to be ridden.
After grooming, I take off the halter, show him the saddle pad and let him think on it. If he licks his lips and puts his head down slightly, that’s how I know it’s fine to proceed.
There have only been three moments so far, when he took off running.
After a tiny moment of feeling disappointed, I shrugged it off and let him be.
I gave up pushing my pony.
I’ve gained a relationship that I didn’t even know could exist.
I am so grateful for this shift.
Knowing I have my pony’s true desire to interact with me, and that he’s now gifted me with 193 rides since we met... to me, that’s priceless.
What are you willing to give up to gain a better relationship with your horse?
May the horse be with you. Always.
-Beth Lauren Parrish
PS If you enjoyed this, please share! Also, have a look at the Focus App... you're horse will thank you!
Beth Lauren Parrish is a Certified Level 3 CHA Riding Instructor and Level 1 Certified Equestrian Tai Chi Instructor. She has taught thousands of lessons for the past 21 years across the United States, and now teaches worldwide remotely.
With her business, Inspired Riding™, Beth has created courses, meditations, the Focus app, and the Companion Journal for Inspired Riders.
All of the above help equestrians become more confident and connected with their horses.
Beth teaches you to trust your intuition and how to have conversations with your horses telepathically. This sets you and your horse up to have the best co-creative dances possible.
Interested in learning more or working with Beth?
Kindly visit: InspiredRiding.com
