What's your bookmark?

~~Installing Bookmarks to Improve Your Riding~~

When I embarked on my very first cross country event, I entered the Green as Grass division.

You know, the one with the smallest jumps possible, as one does when they are just starting out in something new. I rode my sweet Keeper, a twenty-years young caretaker of a thoroughbred, who had already done plenty of Events in his time.

So much so, that when it came to the cross country section, he was moving faster than I wanted to go. He thought we were going for time. I could feel him ‘looking at his hoof’ (wrist watch) and telling me, come on lady, I’ve got you. 🐎

We would have won the entire division, if my nerves hadn’t gotten in the way. We were first in Dressage, cleared the Stadium, and I just felt like I needed a circle in front of one of the fences out in the field, to slow my excited boy down. Which of course counted as a refusal. 😬💕🤷‍♀️

So I came home with a green ribbon, instead of the blue. But in my mind, I was over the moon that I had just completed something I never thought I would do. I loved Dressage and little jumps in the arena. I had never felt brave enough to ride out in the field as an adult.

As a child, I rode across endless fields and trails and cross country jumps with glee. However, over the years, I’ve had so many injuries and trauma, that riding in an event felt like just something else to be scared of and not worth it.

But it really was. 💕

Even though I was ready to vomit the entire time leading up to the count down and hearing the ‘Have a Good Ride’ when it was time to begin, it was so worth it. I proved to myself that something scary could also be fun and extremely rewarding.

So how did I push past my fears? I didn’t ignore them or try and stifle them. I would say out loud how I was feeling and then focused as much as I could on the fun factor.

I acknowledged all of my emotions and became more present in the moment. 🦄

I have specific triggers or bookmarks, that allow me to stay in my body and ride the horse I have, without freezing up. I’d love to share the process with you now. 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽

Let’s begin with the idea of becoming fully present.

How often do you think about other things, besides what is directly in front of you?
If you’re human, it’s quite common to float away very easily!

When you aren’t fully present, your horse knows. They react to in a variety of ways, including checking out, getting agitated, or most often, looking for another being that is more present.

Ever have your horse pull you toward your trainer in the middle of the arena?

I joke and call that the ‘trainer magnet’.

But the struggle is real! Why is that?

Most trainers are more present, especially when they are in their element, teaching their passion of riding! Horses gravitate toward those humans who are effortlessly present and tuned in.

You can become this confident and present!

Try this out:

Take some deep breaths, in through your nose and out through your mouth. Wiggle your toes and scan your entire body. Notice any thoughts that take you away from your body and allow those thoughts to drift.

Focus instead on how amazing it is that you have a healthy body that can ride horses.

Allow your thoughts of the past and future to disappear and be completely focused on all that is presently around you.

What do you see? What do you smell? Can you feel something next to you?

Now think about how your body feels. Honor your feelings, whether you are very up, very down, or somewhere in the middle. Just be willing to accept where you are right now.

Breathe deeply again and feel fully present.

Now for the installation:

Create a ‘bookmark’ for this feeling. It can be anything from tilting your head back for a second, rubbing your fingertips together, or shimmying your hips! It can be a mantra you say to yourself, (I like to say: Breathe, you’re safe, I promise), as well as touching my horse’s mane.

Notice how many times you lose this feeling and fire up your ‘bookmark’. The noticing will also help you become more present by default. Bonus!

Here’s another fun tool: When you feel like you and your horse are completely in sync and feel amazing. Take a mental, physical, auditory, feeling note (however it resonates with you) and memorize it.

This note or bookmark, will be what you will strive for in the next few strides, and the next; until your entire ride feels like one long, amazing bookmarked feeling.

This might take weeks, months, or years. But keep going!

You’re worth it.

And your horse deserves to feel how you are always reaching for those better feeling thoughts and bookmarked feelings.

I would love to hear your thoughts! Join the Inspired Riders group and jump into the conversations! 

May the horse be with you. Always.
~Beth Lauren Parrish

Have you seen the Focus App?

Have a look here: Inspired Riding™ Focus App